How do you tell the community you’ve worked with for almost 3 years, that it’s come time for you to leave? Even the word “leave” sounds so harsh. Last Friday I sat in circle with my girls needing to do just that.
They were being rambunctious young teenagers as usual, but my heart was heavy with what I knew I had to share with them. Once they all calmed down a bit, we went around the circle sharing our favorite part of Girls Group. I was completely caught of guard by their responses. It wasn’t the trips to the beach or waterfalls. It wasn’t all the crafts and fun projects we done. It wasn’t even the baking (though many did mention the importance of chocolate in all our gatherings). For every single one of them, their favorite aspect of Girls’ Group was having a place to come and hangout, make new friends, talk about what’s going on in their lives, and really be listened too. One of the biggest complaints I hear from my girls, is that no one really listens to them, except for at Girls’ Group. They understand their moms are really busy working hard to take care of their families, but they just want to be heard, to know that their feelings matter, and to have the support of an adult they trust.
As I reflected on the girls’ responses, I was reminded that the most valuable resource we have is time. And taking the time to sit with someone and really listen to them, is often much more “effective” than just coming in with a well designed program or a slew of expertise. Yes, the girls have learned a lot through the programing we’ve done in Girls’ Group and they LOVE all of the outings. But at the end of our season together, I know the piece that has made the most impact and encouraged the most growth in these girls, is taking the time to sit, hear their stories, laugh and cry with them, sing Alicia Keys and Avril Lavigne at the top of our lungs, and occasionally use direct conversations to give them the guidance they need. In short, taking the time to really invest in their lives and be a steady presence they know they can count on. To me, this what I think of when the Bible talks about sharing our lives and discipling others.
Even though I feel heart-broken over leaving my girls, I know that they will be okay. God knew about this transition long before I did and had the next team warming up. The girls already love Tracey and they had a great time with Rose at the Waterfall gardens. I know once Tara is here, they’ll be excited to hangout with her too.
On Friday, we cried together a lot. But we also laughed too, and spent a long time recalling all the great memories we’ve shared. At the end of the day we agreed to make the most of these last few weeks we have together and make as many great memories as we can! (And eat as much chocolate as possible)
In these last few weeks, I don't want to be rushed or selfish with my time. I want to be conscious of those around me and really appreciate what we have to share. I know I won't be ready to leave in a month and don't want to miss a moment between now and then.
Sharing Chocolate Gravy for breakfast with my mom and Tracey
